Johannesburg's Hidden Gem: Waterfall City Courtyard Hotel Oasis!
Johannesburg's Hidden Gem: Waterfall City Courtyard Hotel Oasis!
Waterfall City Courtyard Hotel Oasis: My Brain Dump of a Review (Brace Yourself!)
Okay, so, Waterfall City Courtyard Hotel Oasis. Heard of it? Probably. Stayed there? Maybe. But have you truly experienced it? Because I have, and let me tell you, it's a rollercoaster of "Ooh, this is nice!" followed by "Wait, what was that?" and then culminating in a final, exhausted "Yeah, I'd probably go back."
This isn't your glossy, perfectly polished travel blog review. This is the real deal, the messy-haired, coffee-stained notebook version of my stay. Buckle up, buttercups.
Accessibility & Safety First (But Not Always First, If You Get My Drift)
Right, so, accessibility? Pretty decent, frankly. The website promises wheelchair accessibility, and I did spot elevators and ramps. (Accessibility, Wheelchair accessible, Elevator, Facilities for disabled guests) Which is a massive win for anyone needing it, and a huge "thank you" to the hotel for making that a priority. I’m not one for those sorts of things, but seeing it makes me remember my best friend’s Aunt Susan, who uses a wheelchair. This hotel is a win for her!
Safety? They’re TRYING. (Cleanliness and safety, Anti-viral cleaning products, Cashless payment service, Daily disinfection in common areas, Doctor/nurse on call, First aid kit, Hand sanitizer, Hygiene certification, Individually-wrapped food options, Physical distancing of at least 1 meter, Professional-grade sanitizing services, Room sanitization opt-out available, Rooms sanitized between stays, Safe dining setup, Sanitized kitchen and tableware items, Shared stationery removed, Staff trained in safety protocol, Sterilizing equipment, CCTV in common areas, CCTV outside property, Fire extinguisher, Front desk [24-hour], Safety/security feature, Security [24-hour], Smoke alarms) The whole pandemic thing seems to have shaken them up, and the hand sanitizer stations were everywhere. They’re REALLY keen on the whole "clean" thing, which is good, I guess. My inner germaphobe sighed with relief. I'm not sure how much of it is actually effective, but hey, the effort is there, and that counts for something, right? They even offered room sanitization opt-out, which makes me think they are really going above and beyond…or someone is paranoid.
Oh, the Wi-Fi (Or Lack Thereof) (Internet Access, Free Wi-Fi in all rooms!, Internet, Internet [LAN], Internet services, Wi-Fi in public areas, Wi-Fi for special events)
"Free Wi-Fi in all rooms!" the website boasts. Oh, the sweet promise! And yes, there was Wi-Fi. Kind of. It was like a shy lover – present, but not always reliable. I'm talking buffering during Netflix, the sound of silence during video calls, and a general sense of digital frustration. There's LAN internet access too, for the truly committed. The public areas Wi-Fi was marginally better, but still, not amazing. I'm guessing it was a bottleneck. I did get the feeling they were trying, but seriously, in this day and age, reliable Wi-Fi is about as essential as air. (Internet access – LAN, Internet access – wireless)
My Room: A Tale of Two Halves (And a Slightly Smelly Bathroom) (Available in all rooms, Additional toilet, Air conditioning, Alarm clock, Bathrobes, Bathroom phone, Bathtub, Blackout curtains, Carpeting, Closet, Coffee/tea maker, Complimentary tea, Daily housekeeping, Desk, Extra long bed, Free bottled water, Hair dryer, High floor, In-room safe box, Interconnecting room(s) available, Internet access – LAN, Internet access – wireless, Ironing facilities, Laptop workspace, Linens, Mini bar, Mirror, Non-smoking, On-demand movies, Private bathroom, Reading light, Refrigerator, Safety/security feature, Satellite/cable channels, Scale, Seating area, Separate shower/bathtub, Shower, Slippers, Smoke detector, Socket near the bed, Sofa, Soundproofing, Telephone, Toiletries, Towels, Umbrella, Visual alarm, Wake-up service, Wi-Fi [free], Window that opens)
Okay, the room. It was actually pretty decent. Clean, spacious, and with all the usual suspects – comfy bed (extra long, thank the heavens!), a desk for pretending to work, and a mini bar for late-night raids. The air conditioning worked wonders. The black out curtains? A lifesaver. Seriously, I slept in for days! But the bathroom…ah, the bathroom. It was clean, but there was a faint whiff of… something. Not exactly sewage, but something akin to a wet dog that forgot to shower. Honestly, I just kept reminding myself that I had a hot shower and a bathtub (separate shower/bathtub), and it wasn’t so bad. But really, a slightly smelly bathroom is not a great first impression. Additional comment: the room had a scale. That is a true sign of trying to entice a certain clientele. (Bathroom, Mirror, Reading light, Shower, Slippers, Towels, Toiletries)
Dining, Drinking & Snacking: A Buffet of…Experiences (Dining, drinking, and snacking, A la carte in restaurant, Alternative meal arrangement, Asian breakfast, Asian cuisine in restaurant, Bar, Bottle of water, Breakfast [buffet], Breakfast service, Buffet in restaurant, Coffee/tea in restaurant, Coffee shop, Desserts in restaurant, Happy hour, International cuisine in restaurant, Poolside bar, Restaurants, Room service [24-hour], Salad in restaurant, Snack bar, Soup in restaurant, Vegetarian restaurant, Western breakfast, Western cuisine in restaurant)
Breakfast. The buffet. Oh, the buffet! (Breakfast [buffet], Breakfast service, Buffet in restaurant, Coffee/tea in restaurant, Western breakfast). It was a classic hotel buffet, with the usual suspects: eggs, bacon, sad-looking pastries, and enough coffee to fuel a small army. I’m a sucker for a buffet, I’ll admit it. I can’t resist the promise of unlimited carbs. Although, I must say, it was a little… predictable. The saving grace? The coffee was good. (A la carte in restaurant, Asian breakfast, Dessert in restaurant, International cuisine in restaurant, Poolside bar, Room service [24-hour], Snack bar). The pool bar. I did stumble upon the bar, because, well, that's what you do (Bar, Poolside bar). The drinks were strong, but then I can't tell, I was already happily tipsy after the buffet.
Things to Do (Or Not): The Spa and the Struggle Bus (Things to do, ways to relax, Body scrub, Body wrap, Fitness center, Foot bath, Gym/fitness, Massage, Pool with view, Sauna, Spa, Spa/sauna, Steamroom, Swimming pool, Swimming pool [outdoor])
Okay, the spa… (Spa, Spa/sauna, Steamroom) I was so excited: Sauna, steamroom, and a spa. The promise of relaxation! Unfortunately, reality was a little…different. The sauna and steam room were fine, but the whole place lacked atmosphere. It felt a bit… sterile. The massage? It was okay. Not life-changing, but not terrible either. (Massage, Sauna, Steamroom) Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying it was bad, it’s simply that I’m not an experienced critic. (Swimming pool, Swimming pool [outdoor], Pool with view). The pool area was much more promising, though. (Swimming pool, Swimming pool [outdoor], Pool with view). It looked lovely, and I did notice some people enjoying themselves.
Services & Conveniences: The Good, the Bad, and the “Is This Really Necessary?” (Services and conveniences, Air conditioning in public area, Audio-visual equipment for special events, Business facilities, Cash withdrawal, Concierge, Contactless check-in/out, Convenience store, Currency exchange, Daily housekeeping, Doorman, Dry cleaning, Elevator, Essential condiments, Facilities for disabled guests, Food delivery, Gift/souvenir shop, Indoor venue for special events, Invoice provided, Ironing service, Laundry service, Luggage storage, Meeting/banquet facilities, Meetings, Meeting stationery, On-site event hosting, Outdoor venue for special events, Projector/LED display, Safety deposit boxes, Seminars, Shrine, Smoking area, Terrace, Wi-Fi for special events, Xerox/fax in business center)
The concierge was helpful, there’s a little shop, and the housekeeping was efficient. (Concierge, Convenience store, Daily housekeeping, Dry cleaning, Elevator, Facilities for disabled guests, Ironing service, Laundry service, Luggage storage). A doorman too, always a nice touch. The “is this really necessary?” award goes to… the shrine. Yes, a shrine. It was a little odd, tucked away in a corner somewhere. (Cash withdrawal, Currency exchange, Invoice provided, Safety deposit boxes)
For the Kids (Or Not): Baby Sitting and More (For the kids, Babysitting service, Family/child friendly, Kids facilities, Kids meal)
Nope. No kids. But the hotel is "family/child friendly". (Family/child friendly, Babysitting service, Kids meal) No Babysitting though, so I would consider that questionable. (Kids facilities)
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(Okay, buckle up, buttercups, because this isn't your sanitized, perfectly-packaged travel itinerary. This is real life. This is me, unfiltered, wrestling with a trip to the Courtyard Hotel in Waterfall City, Johannesburg. Prepare for a glorious train wreck of a schedule. Let’s do this.)
Subject: Johannesburg Jumble - Courtyard Hotel & the Ghosts of Good Intentions
Day 1: Arrival & Existential Dread in the Jacuzzi (Probably)
10:00 AM (ish): Okay, so the flight. Let's just say… it involved a screaming baby, a questionable in-flight meal, and a near-miss involving a rogue baggage carousel. I'm already regretting everything. South Africa, here I am! (Deep breath…in, out…repeat).
1:00 PM: Landed! Now, to find that blasted… taxi/Uber/whatever. The airport is a chaotic ballet of wheeled suitcases and bewildered tourists. I swear, I saw a guy wearing mismatched socks and a "Free Hugs" t-shirt actually running to his ride. Classic.
2:30 PM: Finally at the Courtyard Hotel. Waterfall City looks… well, it looks like a city designed by the people who made SimCity. Everything is brand new, shiny, and a little bit unsettling. It's the aesthetic equivalent of a freshly-cleaned hospital room. I half expect to be offered a complimentary colonoscopy.
3:00 PM: Check-in. The receptionist is impossibly cheerful. I suspect she's part robot. My room? Clean. A little too clean. I instantly dropped a rogue crumb of a half-eaten biscuit on the spotless carpet to establish my territory.
4:00 PM: The Jacuzzi beckons. Or maybe it should. I intend to go. But right now? Existential dread about the rest of the trip is winning. I might just stare out the window for an hour, contemplating the meaning of life, the merits of instant coffee, and whether or not I packed enough hand sanitizer.
6:00 PM: Actually, screw the Jacuzzi. I'm starving. Gonna find some restaurant, and try to interact with humans other than the polite receptionist. This is gonna be interesting.
Day 2: Culture Shocks & Chicken-Eating Contests (Maybe)
8:00 AM: Breakfast. Continental buffet. The croissants are… passable. The coffee? Undrinkable. I slathered my croissant with every kind of jam possible. The only way.
9:00 AM: Attempt to explore. Waterfall City. It's… a lot of buildings and manicured lawns. It's hard to feel "immersed" in culture here. I think I'm going to die from the lack of soul.
11:00 AM: Decided to hop in an Uber and drive to the city. The driver? An absolute legend. He regaled me with stories about the history of Johannesburg. We talked about everything, from the best places to eat to the political situation. This is the real South Africa!
1:00 PM: Lunch - This is where things go south. I order something… I'm not sure what it was, but it involved something similar to chicken. The restaurant was nice and lively
3:00 PM: Trying to find something to do while waiting for the sunset. Found another restaurant
5:00 PM: Sunset. Johannesburg sunsets are… something. The air turns that amazing golden color. It's a moment where the city feels less sterile, less…corporate. I sat back, had some beer, and watched the lights come on. Amazing.
7:00 PM: Dinner at a restaurant. So good.
9:00 PM: Back at the hotel. Sleep.
Day 3: The (Almost) Perfect Ending
9:00 AM: Breakfast at the hotel. Slightly better coffee but the croissant's were still…meh.
10:00 AM: Spent some time at the hotel gym. Honestly, I think I need to go to the spa. My whole body is aching.
12:00 PM: Got my things packed.
1:00 PM: Check out of the hotel.
2:00 PM: Back at the airport.
4:00 PM: Plane.
6:00 PM: Home.
Final Thoughts:
So, there you have it. My Johannesburg adventure. It wasn't perfect. It wasn't always pretty. But it was real. And sometimes, that's all that matters.
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Waterfall City Courtyard Hotel Oasis: The Chaotic Truth (and Maybe a Little Bit of Paradise)
Okay, Spill the Beans. Is this Waterfall City Oasis REALLY a "hidden gem", or just a fancy hotel with some landscaping?
Look, "hidden gem" is a loaded term, right? Especially in Joburg, where everything feels like it's either a hidden gem or just...hidden. But honestly? Yeah, I'd lean towards gem. It's not like it's a secret you need a decoder ring to find. It's *in* Waterfall City, which is HUGE. But once *inside* the Courtyard Hotel... well, that's when you feel like you've stumbled onto something a little special. Think less "secret society" and more...a surprisingly tranquil oasis *within* a commercial jungle. (And by jungle, I mostly mean the gigantic Mall of Africa, which is a stone's throw away.)
There was this one time, I was there, super stressed from a deal that went sideways. My phone was buzzing, emails were exploding, the usual. I stumbled into the hotel, frazzled, and collapsed on one of those incredibly comfy oversized chairs in the lobby. Suddenly, the world faded to a soft blur of green and water features. I swear, the stress just… melted. It was almost unsettling how effective the whole atmosphere was. That's pure gem material, right there.
What about the rooms? Are they actually nice, or just the usual hotel beige-fest?
Okay, the rooms. Mostly good! They're definitely *not* beige-fests. (Thank goodness, because beige is the enemy of joy). They're modern, clean, and the beds? Seriously, I’ve had better sleep there than I've had at home, which is saying *something* considering my dog snuggles up in my bed, taking up the whole sleeping space. Think crisp white linens, pops of colour (usually blues and greens that echo the outdoor vibe - a nice touch!), and decent-sized bathrooms. They're designed for comfort, and they deliver.
Now, for the "but"... One time, and this is just me being honest, the aircon in my room sounded like a dying walrus. *Rrrraaaaaaaaaaa*. Kept me up all night, which defeated the whole relaxation purpose. Complained the next morning and they switched me, no problem, but still... it's a reminder that perfection is a myth. Also, the Wi-Fi can be a little patchy sometimes. Again, a small price to pay for the general serenity… but bring your own hotspot just in case.
Oh, and *that* balcony!! If you get a room with a balcony overlooking the pool? Worth. Every. Penny. Coffee with a view? Yes please! Late-night drinks under the stars? Absolutely.
That pool looks amazing in all the photos. Is it as good as it seems? And is it crowded?
The pool...the pool is a game changer. The pictures don't lie! That blue water, the lush greenery around it… yes, it's as good as it looks, and it feels even better in person. It's a proper oasis. It's got that sort of infinity edge thing going on, too, which adds to the "escape from reality" feel.
And the crowds? That's the beauty of it. Because the hotel seems to be tucked away, it's generally not overpacked. You can usually find a sun lounger (praise be!), and it’s not the kind of pool where you have to elbow your way past screaming kids to get a swim. Don't get me wrong, there are *some* kids, but generally, it's chill. You actually feel like you're relaxing, swimming or just taking a nap… that's what I needed after the deal, and the pool was exactly what the doctor ordered.
What's the food situation like? Is there a decent restaurant, or are you stuck with room service and sad sandwiches?
Okay, the restaurant is a solid win! It's called "The Courtyard Restaurant," and it's good. Not Michelin-star good, but reliably tasty, and well-priced. They do a great breakfast buffet (those eggs, though!), and the lunch and dinner menus have a decent variety. Think salads, burgers, pizzas, steaks… staples that hit the spot. I've had some excellent chicken peri-peri there. And the ambiance... it's open and airy, with a view of the pool, so you're continuing that relaxed vibe even while you're eating.
Room service? Perfect for those lazy days when you just want to collapse in your robe and watch telly. The menu is similar to the restaurant, so no sad sandwich scenarios. And the cocktails? Worth it, especially when the sun goes down on the balcony. They make a *mean* mojito.
Okay, the location. Is it a pain to get to, or is it actually convenient? And how's the safety in Waterfall City?
The location is a bit of a mixed bag, honestly. It's IN Waterfall City, which is a fairly new, well-planned, and secure area. So, in terms of safety? Generally, it's pretty good! Lots of security, which is a major bonus in Joburg. I never felt unsafe wandering around, day *or* night.
Getting there? Depending on traffic, it can be a breeze or a bit of a slog. It's close to the N1 highway, which is good, but that can also mean… you guessed it, traffic! Especially during peak hours. Consider using an app to check for traffic disruptions.
But here's the upside: You're right next to the Mall of Africa. Love it or hate it (and I have mixed feelings), the fact remains that you've got a vast array of shops, restaurants, and entertainment options *right there*. Need supplies? Done. Want to catch a movie? Easy. Bored and craving a retail therapy fix? Go nuts! It's a double-edged sword - convenient, but potentially distracting from the hotel's tranquility.
Anything else worth mentioning? Little things that make it stand out (or fall flat)?
Okay, the little things… I *love* the staff. Seriously, they're friendly, helpful, and actually seem to *care* that you're having a good time. Small touch, but it goes a long way. They were so accommodating. I remember I was so late for an important call (due to my aforementioned deal going sideways!), and I totally messed up. And the reception was so polite and patient! So they get bonus points for that.
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